Sometimes we can surprise ourselves

For those of you familiar with DiSC–or even better–have been exposed to my own S E L F Profile Assessments that relate directly to the dental industry, I made a very interesting observation on the tennis court with my husband, Russ the other day. Russ is an unusual combination of “S” “L” which is equivalent to the “C” “D” in DiSC. I am a Structured Caregiver while he is an Organized Driver.

His behavior, as does everyone’s, shows up all the time in day-to-day activities and interaction. For example, when we are escorted to our seats in a restaurant I have him pick the table and where we sit.  For me it’s easier to make him happy, and I truly don’t care.

Today on the tennis court he got impatient waiting for me to get back after retrieving some balls.  He was so anxious and VERY ready to start playing that he served without looking across the court to notice that I wasn’t ready. With my head down I was moving into position as the ball bounced into the serving box and then hit me in the head with some force.  Understand that I love to play and make sure he is never easy on me, so the ball was served to me without easing–up hitting it with some force as a strong tennis player would. I enjoy trying to get them back and many times I do, but he is clearly a much stronger player than I.

What upset me so much was that he couldn’t stop long enough to see that I wasn’t ready to accept the serve. He apologized of course, but from that moment I began to play like I have never played before.  I started to smack the balls as hard as I could and they were all going in. I actually had him running and missing many of my shots.  It was as though I was possessed, channeling my Serena Williams.  This brought out a side of me that I never saw before and Russ was amazed too!

What’s interesting about this is that it was such a change from my normal demeanor that I found I could only hold out for 2 games and then resorted back to my comfort zone.  It wasn’t due to fatigue. It was due to a behavioral style that was not at all familiar to me.

This is what I coach all the time regarding how our behavioral makeup can be adjusted only to a certain degree, and we will inevitably return to the style that with which we identify.  We can make small changes in how we accomplish things, yet changing our behaviorial style completely is something that really can’t be done.

What I did learn is that I do have it in me if/when I want to get a little aggressive–at least on the tennis court.